THE THERAPHY....

I was in pretty bad shape a few days ago. not physically but mentally disturbed perhaps..stress is much preferable as to define what i had at that time..i couldnt focus on other things since i kept thinking about it everywhere and anywhere i go. suddenly i felt very much suffocated with it and my neck started to ache like i was carrying 100kg of burden on my shoulder. this was followed by dizziness which made me feel like throwing up. and i could say that, it has successfully strip away my mood of the day.luckily it happened almost at the end of the day and no one would see me in that state of mind.

Well, i guess i just need a good rest, i mean a solid,total and a quality of good rest. since there was not much of good options of having it, i thought sleeping would be the best option as it is easier, economic plus it can be done anywhere and anytime i want.

That night, before having my "stress theraphy", i performed my isya' prayer as usual. As i finished, i sat there for about 15 mins refreshing and replaying what have i did through the day and how that i got myself into this trouble. i say my prayer to ALLAH, so helplessly. i let everything out of my chest at that time with my heart full of embarrassment and hope. ashamed of myself who only turn to HIM everytime i got myself into trouble especially stuff that beyond my reach. hoping that HE will help me trough it.but somehow, despite the embarrassment, only to HIM i completely pouring myself to.. feeling so free with the fact of me being myself....

thou i know, HE would know without me telling.......

Somehow, that moment of self refining really helps me a lot. the burden seems to lessen a lot. leaving only the tiredness after going through the day. the comfortness and the feeling of safe and secure really cured and eased my breakdown just now. which exactly what i need at that time. and how silly i am to just not realize it earlier.

Ya ALLAH,

KAU ampunilah segala dosaku, dosa kedua ibu bapaku,keluargaku, guru-guru ku, rakan-rakan ku serta seluruh umat islam didunia ini, yang hidup mahupun yang telah meninggal dunia..

tunjukkanlah aku jalan yang benar dan jalan yang diredhai olehMu..
berkatilah hidupku..
permudahkan lah urusanku..
kuatkanla semangatku yang seringkali luntur di pertengahan jalan ...
kerana sesungguhnya..aku ini hamba mu yang lemah lagi hina...
dan sesungguhnya KAU lah tempat aku meminta pertolongan dan perlindungan
dan sesungguhnya, KAU la yang MAHA PEMURAH lagi MAHA PENYAYANG...

amin...

p/s: im not perfect, yet im far from it..i do make mistake and im not proud of it..juz take a second and try to look back what we have achieved so far..we might realize that we may not make it this far without HIM whom always being forgotten.....